I am starting to feel clear. It's just this week, but I feel clean. I feel like my mind is a bit more clear. I am becoming better at letting go and distancing myself. I enjoy this time alone. It's not ideal. No one want to go through trauma, but today I am appreciating what … Continue reading Improvement;
This word is heavy. This word is tense. This words fights. This word is cold. This word is bold and underlined. How am I the only one with ideas? You ask me all of the time: Well, what would you like me to do? Well, tell me what I should say! Tell me what to … Continue reading Limits;
It's been just over a month. The day before Valentine's day was our D-Day. What an awful holiday to begin with, but now? Now it is forever ruined in my mind. The day of love and admiration is the day of your betrayal, destruction, and mistrust for me. Forever. Forever ruined. I've never had a … Continue reading Repairing;
However lovely the day, it's in the back of my mind. Every time. It creeps in like the quiet blow of cold air when the house is trying to maintain it's temperature. I remember different things every time. The fights, the sex, the routines, the silence, and most of all the rings. It's an eerie … Continue reading Journey;
It was made. However hard. Through it all; the fighting, screaming, crying, drinking myself in to a spiraling downward plane. I did it. I chose you, again; like always. I chose you. Ever in my life had I thought I knew love; I did not. No love could ever measure up to how quickly I … Continue reading Decision;
It felt surreal. You made a huge decision and it was all for me; for us. You left everything. Packed it all up and walked away from it all. Like you were just turning the light off in the garage and closing the door. It was simple to you. Like a small gesture of love. … Continue reading Moving to AZ;
There you were, walking up the my apartment door. You are nervous, you are walking fast, but there is a hint of a smile. I am fluttering on the inside. It is big, whatever it it, it is big. We both knew what it was; or maybe it was only me. Either way, this feeling … Continue reading The beginning;
